By Diane Falls
Hmm … What should I do on Sunday? My typical answer would have been: go to church. But Sunday, Sept. 22, was different. It was 19 months in the making and marked 10 years since my multiple sclerosis diagnosis. It was also the day I participated in the Ramblin’ Rose Women’s Triathlon in Huntersville, N.C.
My quest began when my therapist at Carolinas Rehab “broke up” with me in the fall of 2012. She thought I had made all the progress I was able to make in both physical and vestibular rehab and that I should transition to the YMCA and try water exercise. It really did feel like a break-up. But going to rehab was my “job” (while the kids were at school and daycare) for six months. I was anxious about leaving the comfort of that situation, especially since my therapist and I connected personally. I was really sad about not having her to talk to a few times a week.
I knew that I was not in control of the BIG things in my life. I have learned that the hard way. God is truly the only one who is charge of those big things and plans. But I felt so out of control in so many areas of my life. But I thought maybe if I worked on this small thing – water exercise – I would start to feel less anxious with my situation.
I soon realized that being in the water was like a religious experience for me. It is the one place that I feel like it is Sept. 8, 2003, again – the day before my first MS flare-up. When I am in the pool, I feel like a rock star! I feel like the athlete I once was.
I soon started to wonder: Could I learn to swim laps again? So one day after my water class, I ducked over to the lap lanes. On that first day, I couldn’t even swim a lap and that was mainly due to not being able to kick my feet and legs. I was trying to do the lap with just my arms. It was pretty rough, but it was a start. Then in January 2013, I started attempting to do a lap or two once in a while. I tried to use a kickboard to isolate my feet and legs, which was really hard for me, but soon I could do two laps with kicking.
Then I began to wonder … what if I had a goal?
Most swim races were going to be too far out of my reach. But then I remembered that my dear friend Hilary (and many of my other teacher friends) had done the Ramblin’ Rose triathlon several years ago. I Googled it and found out that the swim was 250 yards, just 10 laps! I knew I couldn’t bike and I knew I couldn’t run, but I knew 10 laps might be possible.
So I began to think: Maybe I could find some friends to do the other parts of the race and we could be a relay team. But I was still a long way from 10 laps at this point. So my true training began in March 2013 (around my 40th birthday). Hilary was the only one who knew and I had her on standby to do the other parts if I thought I could do the swim part by late September.
During this time, I had some health setbacks. I also had to deal with some family health issues. There began to be more and more reasons for me not to do this. The big things in my life were even more out of my control and uncertainty still remained a major theme. What could I do? I could quit, I thought; I haven’t told anyone but Hilary.
Or, I could keep swimming. And that is what I did.
I emailed the Ramblin’ Rose director and she was more than willing to accommodate my special needs. I even asked her if using a walker and leg braces would be allowed to walk the two miles instead of running it. She said that would be fine and that Hilary could even walk with me.
So I registered us as a relay team. Team name: Put Your Big Girl Panties On and Just TRI It! I would do the swimming. Hilary, who was still the only one who knew of my plan, would do the bike part. But I hadn’t yet decided who would do the walking/running part.
During the late summer, more things kept feeling out of control. I kept thinking, I don’t know if I can do this. There were some very difficult things coming down the family pike that fall. But through the anxiety, fear and uncertainty I kept swimming and now recumbent biking.
Soon, it was just four days until race day. I was neurologically weaker than I had ever been, but physically fitter and muscularly stronger than I had been in 14 years. And the scale told me that I hadn’t been at this weight since 1999.
In a few days I knew it would be game on.
When that day finally came, Hilary and I arrived at Huntersville Family Fitness & Aquatics at 6:30 a.m. The place was abuzz with women of all ages, shapes and sizes. The range in ages was from 10 to 70 and older – what an amazing sight to see! The energy was really high and uplifting. The huge pool was divided into two parts. Crystian Kumnick, who was in charge of the swim, already knew of my situation and we decided I would swim on the part that had the shallow end. So we parked my walker near the end of that part. I was planning to boost myself up on the pool’s edge to get out since I can’t use the ladder. I had been practicing this at the YMCA. Crystian also said it was fine to give more than the 10-second space before me and after me to help me with my vision/vestibular/depth perception issues. If a person had to touch my foot to pass me, or swam past me, it may have disoriented me. So giving a little space cushion would hopefully help with this issue.
It was now almost race time. We all got together in a large group and had a little pep rally. It pumped everyone up. Being in large groups like that makes me anxious and that day was no exception. Before that day, I was so scared that I was not going to be able to compete with this able-bodied group of women. But while waiting for my group swim number to be called, so many women said wonderful and encouraging things to Hilary and me. In fact, the whole morning was that way for the most part. Other women kept telling us they liked our team name, T-shirts and my “bedazzled” walker.
Soon, my swim number was called and I entered the aquatics center. Hilary was nice enough to stand in line with me the whole time, which helped with my nerves. I could now see into the pool area. When I saw some of the swimmers doing backstroke or swimming without even putting their heads in the water I started to relax. As we entered the pool area, I could see Jason, Bradley, Luke and Sydney holding signs and cheering. My dear, dear friends Nancy Cousar and Denise Wyatt were sitting with them.
When it was my turn, I sat down on the pool deck, handed my cane to Hilary and waited until the swimmer ahead me was about three-fourths of the way down the lane. As I was about to push off, I could see Crystian out of the corner of my eye. He looked me right in the eye and said what so many had been telling me for four days: “Go get ’em, Diane!” And I did!
My adrenaline was really pumping and I could feel I may have started too fast. But soon, I was having to wait at the end of the lane for others to go and even had to pass a few swimmers. I loved looking up when I got to the far side of the lane and seeing my family cheering me on! After I got to the end, I quickly realized that the “shallow end” was not four or five feet deep. It was six foot six inches deep. There was no way I could boost myself up without being able to touch the floor of the pool. The ladder was my only choice.
Two volunteers were already there with my walker and cane. I yelled to them, “I can’t do ladders! Could you please get me out?” They swiftly lifted me under my arms and boosted me up the ladder and helped me out of the pool. My legs were buckling so badly at this point. But I was off to the transition area to pass off to Hilary. This was the longest two or three minutes of my life. My legs were not cooperating and I felt like I could puke. But I finally made it and Hilary was on her way. I knew I had about 30 minutes to get dressed and put leg braces and shoes on. So the first 10 minutes I just sat on the ground in my bathing suit, trying to catch my breath. Every person who passed by me had encouraging words to say.
Thirty minutes went by quickly and Hilary was back. It was now time to walk two miles. I had feared this moment leading up to that day. But I knew there was no way I was not going to do it. No matter how long it took.
I can’t lie – several times I wished I could have just thrown the freaking walker and run the rest of the way. But that wasn’t in the plan and I had to be OK with that. The runners, crowd and volunteers were so encouraging by cheering for everyone. What a feeling! We got to see my personal supporters, including my friend Arika Bateman and her boyfriend, Tim, a few times during the two-mile loop. As we neared the finish line, I could see my three kids and friends cheering.
The tears began to flow when the emcee announced, “Here comes Team Put Your Big Girl Panties On and Just TRI It! Diane Falls, you are a triathlete!” Hilary and I crossed the finish line together and were given our medals. We cried and hugged each other so tight (a few times) and then I saw Jason … no words needed! The kids ran up and my 4-year-old, Sydney, said, “Mommy, you won!” Yes, Sydney, I sure did! Hugs and tears were all around for kids and friends. It was a priceless moment.
I started this journey with the goal to just finish. But our results were far better than that goal. Our relay placed 19th out of 24 teams, which was great considering that we walked the entire “run” part. The results far exceeded our expectations. I can’t begin to thank Hilary for making this goal a reality for me. I feel like even if we had come in dead last, we still would have won. I want to thank everyone for their kind, loving and motivating words. I carried them with me through the race.
If someone had told me a year ago that I would do what I did that day – swim and walk with mobility devices – in front of a huge amount of people, I would have said they were insane. But I know God is the one who is really in control and I am so grateful that He blessed me with strength, courage and determination to “put my big girl panties on” and reach this goal.
My Top 3 Reasons for Doing a Ramblin’ Rose Triathlon
1. Me! I need to set goals for myself and have a sense of accomplishment.
2. My dear, supportive husband, Jason. I want him to know that I am not done fighting! Things have looked really bad at times and I certainly have my days. But I am not done fighting – not even close.
3. My three precious kids, Bradley, Luke and Sydney. I need them to see me accomplish something they never thought I could. I need them to know that even though I may have to compete differently and it will take everything I’ve got, I can reach my goal. I want them to know they can do the same thing, despite any obstacle.
